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Single Girl Survival: 4th of July

July 3, 2012

So, it’s that time of year again. That time when we are reminded that there are no fireworks in our personal lives but, oh don’t worry, there are plenty in the sky to make sure you don’t forget that. Not to mention, all the cute couples snuggled on their blankets watching them. Resist the urge to throw things at them and instead, have fun the single girl way.

You will need:

-Friends. This one is important. You may be alone in the relationship department but, you’ll need your friends (or at least some family members) in order to go enjoy the holiday and do something other than sit outside with your dog/cat and a bottle of sangria.

-Very cute and somewhat festive/slutty attire. Now, when I say SOMEWHAT I mean SOMEWHAT. DON’T be that person in the battery operated tee shirt you got at the county fair. DON’T be a prostitute in an American flag bikini and heels. DO be the girl in the cute short shorts and bright red tube top with a fun festive bow in your hair.

-Red lipstick. Let’s be serious. This is the only way a dude is going to notice how much he wants to kiss you. Give him the green light and wear some killer red lipstick. [My personal fave is Revlon Matte in Really Red. It lasts for hours.]

-Bug spray. This is a given. DON’T be the whiny girl complaining the bugs are biting you. DO be the cute girl that can offer the whiny people (and cute boys) some bug spray from her purse.

-Perfume. To cover smell of said bug spray. Seriously. That stuff smells awful.

-Festive nails. Even if they are simply red. Or alternate red and white. Believe me, people notice. Be the girl who people compliment! It’ll make you feel better.

-Gum. Just have it. DON’T be Betty Bad Breath.

-Booze. You saw this one coming. Lots and lots of booze. In a water bottle. In your purse. In a flask. I don’t care. You’ll need it in order to put the blinders on and not notice Overly Attached Only Together for the Summer Couple. Now, I would next say to DON’T be that girl who drinks too much and by 11pm is either throwing up in public or crying in public but, the odds of that not happening are fairly slim. If it happens, embrace it. Just hide the puking behind a tree, reapply your lipstick, chew some gum, spritz your perfume, and take another sip of your drink.

-Confidence. This is key. Everyone notices a confident chick. DON’T be cocky just be confident. Smile. Dudes will smile back and want to know who you are!

On that note, I hope you all have a safe and amazing 4th of July! I know I will!

Make the best of it! It’s America’s birthday! Who doesn’t love a birthday party?! We are after all celebrating freedom & independence so, embrace your own and be sure to yell, “I’m celebrating my freedom to be SINGLE!”

Failing to Mingle,
SGP

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